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X-Rated Bloodsuckers

Mario Acevedo

Published 2007      332 pages

Summary (from the book jacket)

When Felix Gomez returned from the War in Iraq with a distain for daylight and a raging thirst for blood, he knew he couldn’t settle for an ordinary 9-to-5 job.  So after his discharge, the newly undead ex-infantryman chose the career that he felt best suited his vampiric tendencies: private detective.

Now he’s been approached by sexy porn star Katz Meow, who wants Felix to investigate the murder of her once-equally agile friend and fellow toiler in the video sex-biz, Roxy Bronze.  But his investigation into L.A.’s hardcore jungle is turning into a triple x-rated nightmare populated by hot babes, sleazy producers, sleazier politicians, sham evangelicals, and fanatical secret societies.  And here on the seamy underside of Tinseltown, “immortal” doesn’t necessarily mean “unkillable.”

The Review

X-Rated Bloodsuckers is Mario Acevedo’s second novel featuring vampire PI Felix Gomez.  Humorous and hard-boiled, if the nymphomaniacs and space aliens from The Nymphos of Rocky Flats (the Felix Gomez novel) weren’t enough to convince you that Mario Acevedo isn’t writing standard vampire PI  material, I’m not sure what will. 

X-Rated Bloodsuckers continues Felix’s investigative adventures, only this time it is Hollywood’s sleazy porn industry that comes under his scrutiny rather than Rocky Flats.  Both of these novels are stand alone stories and while The Nymphos of Rocky Flats has a couple of chapters about how Felix became a vampire in the first place it isn’t necessary to have read that book before diving into X-Rated Bloodsuckers.

With a title like X-Rated Bloodsuckers and a plot involving porn stars you might easily get the wrong impression about this book but don’t worry, it isn’t full of weird vampire sex and it doesn’t have a sex driven plot either.  This is a solid hard-boiled detective story in the noir style almost like Raymond Chandler might have written, just with vampires and a large dose of humour.

The plot starts out in a deceptively simple manner with a murdered porn star whose best friend approaches Felix and asks him to investigate the murder.  The plot soon thickens when Felix realises that the prime suspect for the murder, Cragnow, is a vampire and not just any vampire but the one in charge of the entire LA area.  He believes that Cragnow has broken the most sacred vampire law, revealing the existence of vampires to humans and is asked by the ruling body of vampires, the Araneum, to investigate this crime too.

The murder of Roxy Bronze and the indiscretion of Cragnow seem to be related but Felix has his work cut out for him proving it when his investigation reveals that many people wanted Roxy dead.  As Felix tracks down leads, more and more of the people that he talks to end up dead and soon Felix himself is dodging runaway trucks and silver bullets in an effort to avoid ending up the same way.

X-Rated Bloodsuckers is a detective mystery novel with a fast paced plot line that will keep mystery lovers guessing right to the end.  Populated with quirky characters, both of the vampire and human varieties, it is a fun detective fantasy that will both amuse and delight vampire mystery fans.

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